I was so excited to do the new Flat Rodvik meme from Berry! I saw it last night before I went to bed and happily planned my afternoon with the guy.
Things didn’t turn out how I expected.
I thought we’d start our afternoon together with some ice cream! Who doesn’t like ice cream, am I right? I couldn’t decide what flavor, so we got 3 scoops of fun! At least, I got 3 scoops of fun. When I offered some to Rodvik, he was kind of disinterested in it.
Well, no biggie. I guess he’s lactose intolerant and didn’t want to spoil the rest of our day with running to the bathroom. That was very polite of him, now that I think about it!
We stuck around my vacation home because I thought that he’d probably enjoy just having fun there and away from crowds. After all, when you’re a Linden – especially the top Linden! – you’re probably happy to not be slammed with IMs from crazy people. I thought he’d enjoy a ride on my new whirly thing!
Okay. First of all, he didn’t even OFFER to push it, so I had to do all the pushing. Which, that’s FINE… I’m sure it’s hard to push in his robe and sandals. That’s fine. But then he just stood basically in the middle. That’s hardly any fun! Maybe he has issues with being dizzy? Some people do.
Things really started going south when I challenged him to a twerking contest and he wouldn’t even TRY. Who wouldn’t want to twerk with me?!
By this time, I was annoyed. He didn’t want ice cream, he didn’t want to spin, he didn’t want to twerk. What was the deal?? Was he tired? Bored of me? Doesn’t like blondes? Hungry??? Finally I offered him some delicious rice bunnies from my bento box and he was totally not into it!!
You know what, Flat Rodvik? YOU KNOW WHAT? There are lots of people who would love to play with me and spin with me and twerk with me and eat my rice bunnies!! TONS OF PEOPLE.
Whatev. You can find your own way home. I’m going inside for a nap.