The End of One Year, The Start of Another.

Happy New Year’s Eve, everyone! Today marks the 9th year of this blog! I started it at a time in my life that wasn’t great, and I wanted to just … start over, be someone else. I don’t know exactly. But what ended up happening is that I became more myself than ever. And that’s a good thing.

But we all know my backstory at this point. If you don’t…I dunno, go watch this video and it explains it all. πŸ™‚

So, 2016.

This wasn’t my Best Year Ever. But it wasn’t all that bad either. On the RL side of things, I didn’t lose anyone, and that makes me enormously grateful. Considering the 2016 that some people have had, the fact that all of my loved ones are still alive is basically the only thing I could have asked for.

In SL, I’ve definitely had ups and downs this past year. But more ups than downs. I love my partner of over 5 years, and he is always so patient and supportive of me. I love my little girls. I love the rest of the family. I love the life we’ve created and I’m so thankful that we’re going into yet another year together.

What Are You Doing New Year's Eve?

This year in SL, it even took me to a new place – YouTube! I never ever thought that I would be vlogging on YouTube. I didn’t think that anyone would want to watch a random SL avatar doing mostly non-fashion, almost always non-trolling things. But they do! And not only do they watch, they interact with me in a way that I never would have expected. It’s amazing and sometimes a little scary [like when people just show up in our house just to “look around.”] but still something that I am just loving to do.

What astounds me every year is that SL always seems to have something to teach me. Just when I think I’ve learned all the lessons possible, it puts another one in my lap. Not just about photos or how to do things. But just life lessons. This past year taught me that I do have to know where my boundaries are. I have learned when to pull back when I have given as much as I could, and not to try to give more when it is not making me happy to do so. I often put myself last when it comes to what I want because I so badly want everyone else to have what they want first. This doesn’t work in the long run because I become resentful that my needs aren’t being met when it’s my fault that I didn’t say what I needed in the first place. That’s definitely a lesson I’m taking with me from 2016 – for both my worlds.

So what’s coming up for me in 2017? Well, more videos, obviously. I want to learn more about my chosen editing program, and make more content that people will like to watch. I’d like to be more social, and maybe make a few closer friends. Or at least one. *laughs* And of course, I want to keep on with my blogs. Yes, even this one, although I think vlogging will take priority over this blog. I guess I could update this one with my videos when I put them out? We’ll see.

But most importantly… I think I’m going to give myself a rest this 2017. Not take a break. But just give myself a rest from this constant fight I have with my body, and this need to compete against everything and anything. I live my days in this near constant state of anxiety because I’m always attempting to do the perfect things that I feel like I’m supposed to do, and then everything overwhelms me so quickly because I know I can’t control everything. Emotionally, my mind is exhausted. Physically, my body pretty much is, too. Maybe if I were kinder to myself, things that I want to accomplish would just happen in their own time if they are meant to happen. I’d kind of like to find out.

Thank you all for sticking with me this year! I hope you all have a very safe and happy new year’s eve, and just an amazingly wonderful 2017! β™₯

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An October Update, I guess?

Ayyyy, it would be great if I’d update more, wouldn’t it? But I guess you guys could just watch my YouTube videos. :-p

Anyway. πŸ™‚ Happy Halloween, everyone! Things here are good. Saturday night, we took Abby, Birdy, and our friend Cindy out to some Halloween things!

Trick or treating with the girls!

They’re so adorable. ❀

It was all a good time! The RC Cluster trick or treat event was really awesome. We tried one event but it was RIDICULOUS and we couldn't even progress, so pfft to that. If you're going to sign up to be on a trick or treat tour, maybe a homestead where you have your roleplay school isn't the best idea? I'm just sayin'. So then we went somewhere else and that was much easier. Woo! But ugh, how much did we miss Havenhollow this year??? That is always the thing our whole family does together and I really hate that it wasn't being done this year.

I've been slowing down a bit on the videos this past week. It's not really intentional. I just haven't had much to say. I know, me, queen of the incessant rambling. I don't know. You longtime readers of this blog know that November isn't my best month, and as much as I try to push through, things like blogging and videos and SL in general sometimes don't always get my full attention. But I guess we'll see what happens. I think maybe I also got a little overwhelmed by the wonderful people who watch my videos. I really appreciate everyone who has taken the time to watch my videos and reach out to me, but it did get slightly overwhelming for a little bit. I'm so incredibly shy and have such social anxiety, the fact that people wanted to talk to me was so weird in my brain. *laughs* But I have made new friends through my videos, and they have been nice enough to understand that I am just very slow to actually talk to people. Re-opening the Ch'Know group was a good move, I think. I love when I log in and people are actually talking in it.

So…I guess this is my post for October? LOL! I will try very hard to post more in November for those of you who don't really care to watch my videos to see what's going on in my SLife. But I make no promises. ❀

Happy Easter!

Happy Easter, dear ones! We had our Easter party with the family and it was lots of fun!!

The Family OZ - Easter 2015

After dancing and food, we headed out to do a couple of things. One was the Holi Hunt out at the Magic of Oz! It was fun running around looking for the little pots of colors, and we got some cute prizes! Takeo even got a dress! *laughs*

Then we headed out to Easter Town to hunt eggs and race peeps! We did this last year, too, but it’s always fun and the prizes are always different. I love that the people who own the sim always do cool things for holidays. They’re the ones who did the Halloween town and the winter area. It is also family friendly, which of course is something we look for when we head out with our little ones. Of course, you still might see some people who don’t get that it’s more of a family friendly sim [despite the bright colors, bunnies, and , but that’s pretty much true anywhere anyone goes.

We have to finish up packing the car today so we’re ready to head to the airport on Monday. I think we’re staying on vacation longer than usual this time around, so we have to put a few extra things in our bags. I still need to find a few more bathing suits, too. So much to do! πŸ™‚

My Family of Valentines

Happy Valentine’s Day, dear ones! It’s barely the 14th, but I know I won’t have time to update later. πŸ™‚ Not that my updates are consistent or anything, but I do try to come around for holidays!

So Friday, we had a family Valentine’s party! Tonight there is a black and red formal Valentine’s dance, but that is an adult party and we couldn’t let our little ones be left out of valentine fun!

My family of valentines

Birdy and Aldwyn aren’t in that picture because we took it pretty early in the evening before Aldwyn got online, and my poor Birdy is under the weather. And I’m not REALLY that much smaller than my sister! She was wearing heels and I was in flat sandals. If we’re not wearing shoes, we’re usually around the same height!

My sis cooked up a great meal for us of sushi, steak [and tuna steak for the non-cow eaters!], and for dessert we could have chocolate mousse or ice cream! Riley had both. She might have a chocolate problem. *laughs*

Dinner with my valentines!

Of course, certain little girls can’t be contained and Payton might have decided when dessert was over. She’s lucky she’s cute. I wouldn’t have just anyone dancing around in my ice cream. [And I was also having a ridiculous time keeping things rezzed tonight, so that’s what’s up with that gray box on her wrist.]

Welp. I guess dessert is over!

But then my sis gave us all presents! It was like Christmas! She even gave me a gift that I think was more of a gift for Aldwyn. *snickers*

After gifts were over, we went to their little beach and … well, there was the BIGGEST FONDUE POT EVER.

Giant Fondue

We became marshmallows! We had to run up the fork, dip ourselves in chocolate, and then jump down. I, of course, won with a time of 29 seconds! Go me! That kinda made up for when we did marshmallow sumo wrestling later and I was the first to fall over the side. Ahem.

When we got home, Aldwyn and I got our outfits for the formal. Usually it takes him foreverrrrr to find clothes, but he found something super quick this time. I was the one who went through 29030923 demos. This is the thing about me, and might be a problem for a lot of bloggers – Sometimes we honestly have no idea what to wear when we’re not doing a post! Really! It’s soooo much easier when I say “Okay, today I need to blog this event/store” and boom! It gets done. But tell me “You just have to look nice” and it’s like OMG WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE. *laughs* And also, when I blog, it really doesn’t matter if I blog the same item as someone else. Most creators and events have more than a dozen bloggers at any given time and it happens. But for a big dance like this, I don’t want to wear the same dress as anyone else. So I tried not to go directly to any of the bigger formals stores or pick a dress that I thought someone else would be in. I really like the dress I chose. I think it’s super classy and since it’s in black, I can wear it again if we ever choose to go out to a fancy dance club for a date night.

Bedtime!

Walking Into The New Year

Happy 2015! Since the Grand Canyon was empty tonight, I headed over after changing out of my party clothes and took a walk around the place. Just to think, mostly.

Walking Into The New Year

I don’t really make resolutions any more. I do make some goals for the year, but they’re loose goals. I don’t like feeling bad if I don’t accomplish something. And really, I set little goals for myself all year long, so just because it’s the first day of the new year doesn’t mean I need to set my whole year in stone. Does that make sense? Forgive me if it doesn’t, it’s after 4am here. πŸ™‚

This coming year, I mostly want to try a little harder in things that I already do. For instance, my style blog. I think that I do some decent pics these days, and I like writing a little something about what I’m wearing, and I think that I do a pretty good job of crediting items. But I’m awfully sporadic with it. I just blog when I happen to feel like it and that means that I use very little of what I’m given. [At least, on the blog. I actually use more stuff in just my everyday SLife than I show on the blog.] So I want to try to get myself on more of a schedule for blogging. Or, at the very least, try for more than just once a week. I’ve been doing this for over 5 years, I feel like I would probably be more well known as a fashion blogger if I actually did it more often.

I also want to try a little harder in my friendships with people. I think that people take my silence for disinterest sometimes, and that’s not really the case. I’m simply used to being the one who waits to be spoken to. This is not just something that occurs in SL, either. It’s just that I’m used to being the listener and so I tend to wait until I’m needed. But this also means that I don’t cultivate my friendships as I should. I get left out of a lot of things because I guess I seem like I’m not interested since I don’t speak up. So that’s definitely something I want to work on.

And then, of course, I am always striving to be a better SL mom and wife and sister and aunt. They tell me I’m fine, but I know I could be better. I want to be better for them.

Do you guys make resolutions or goals or have a “try harder” list for the new year?

I am super tired now and haven’t slept since 2014 [lol! i couldn’t help it.] so I think it’s bedtime for me. πŸ™‚

My Christmas Wish

‘Cause I just want you here tonight
Holding on to me so tight.
What more can I do?
Baby, all I want for Christmas is you.

This is our 5th Christmas together. I know, right?? I just had to go back through my blog to see if I had miscounted, even though I was counting on my fingers. But yep, our 5th Christmas. Even though I told him that all the Arcade stuff he got me is present enough, he still wanted to get me something else. I am easy to buy gifts for because I truly appreciate anything people give me. But I’m also quite hard to buy gifts for because I blog for a lot of my favorite stores already, plus I shop quite a bit on my own! So when he wants to give me something, it has to be something I wouldn’t normally buy for myself. Today Maitreya released their new mesh body. As soon as we signed on tonight, he dragged me down there to buy it. πŸ™‚ I was planning on demoing it at some point but I already have the Slink Physique and only seem to wear that when I’m wearing things that show my legs. And not to mention that Pink Fuel doesn’t have appliers for it yet. But he didn’t care. He said it could sit in my inventory if I wanted, but he was buying it for me.

Who am I to argue?

We went home and I played around with it. I don’t wear Glam Affair skins [which are already preloaded into the HUD], but I happened to have some old ones from an event last year, plus the Slink appliers for one of the tones. It’s really a very nice body, and I like the alpha options. But until Pink Fuel does appliers for it, it’s not something I’ll wear often. Plus, let’s face it. I wear a lot of big sweaters and jeans. There’s basically so reason to wear a mesh body when you’re wearing that stuff.

But there are good reasons to have mesh bodies, too. Like when you want to wear pretty, skimpy clothes while smooching on the man who has been good to you for 5 Christmases. And while you kiss him, you make your Christmas wish that there will be more Christmases together in the future.

My Christmas Wish

The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year!

So a year ago today, Abby became our daughter. πŸ™‚

It’s been a heck of a year! But a really good one. We had nooo idea that we’d be so happy as SL parents. Really! But it just completely makes sense. Nothing I’ve done in my entire SLife has made me as happy as being part of a family in SL has made me. Maybe my family life started the day I got married, or the day I was sibling adopted, but I think it wasn’t really official until one red headed 8 year old became a Zanzibar. πŸ™‚

We had our party on Wednesday and it was really fun! Lots of laughter and many good friends and family dropped in. It was great to see everyone!!

Yesterday, we were finally able to take our holiday picture. If you’re one of our close friends or family members, you’ll probably get a copy of it in world [at least, from one of the girls. I’m actually pretty bad at sending things out!], but I wanted to share here, too. I’m sure I’ll post again before Christmas, but if I do not, have a wonderful holiday!

Happy Holidays!!